Episode 47:

How to Cultivate a Culture of Connection in the Digital Age with Anne Moss Rogers

How do we raise our kids in the current culture to foster resilience and connection? I’m diving into that question today with TedX speaker and author, Anne Moss Rogers.

Anne Moss is the owner of the popular Emotionally Naked Blog. She’s a social media and content marketing expert who turned into an accidental leader as a suicide prevention advocate after her son, Charles, who suffered from depression and addiction, died by suicide in June of 2015.

In this episode, we talk about Anne Moss’ story and how to help our kids develop the skills they need to problem solve and connect with others in a day in age where face-to-face interactions are fewer than they ever have been.

Learn more about Anne Moss Rogers at AnnMossRogers.com and download her freebie, 9 things you can do to help your kids learn coping skills to build resilience. Head over to the Parenting with Love and Authority facebook group to continue this important conversation. Thanks for listening!

And once they express how they feel, you can work with that and then you can ask more questions because sometimes when they talk about their fears, it drags it out into the spotlight and it loses its sizzle.

TODAY’S GUEST:

Anne Moss Rogers

Anne Moss Rogers is a TEDx speaker and owner of the popular Emotionally Naked blog. She is a social media and content marketing expert who turned into an ‘accidental leader’ as a suicide prevention advocate after her son Charles, who suffered from depression and addiction, died by suicide in June 2015. Anne Moss’ book, The Diary of a Broken Mind, comes out in October 2019!

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Intro:          00:25 Welcome to the Raiseology podcast with your host, pediatrician and parenting consultant, Sharon Somekh here to empower parents to raise resilient and independent children. Grab your coffee or your Margarita and let’s get started. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should be used to supplement rather than substitute the care provided by your physician. 

 

Sharon:          00:25 Hi everyone and welcome back to the Raiseology podcast. I’m really excited to have Anne Moss Rogers here today. She is a TedX speaker and the owner of the popular Emotionally Naked Blog. She’s a social media and content marketing expert who it turned into an accident to leader as a suicide prevention advocate after her son, Charles, who suffered from depression and addiction, died by suicide in June of 2015 she’s been interviewed by The New York Times and was the first suicide loss survivor ever invited to speak at the National Institute of Mental Health. Her blog Emotionally Naked, which focuses on subjects including suicide, grief, addiction, and mental illness, reached over half a million views in the first three years. She has written a book, The Diary of a Broken Mind that includes her son’s song lyrics, which will publish in October of 2019. Originally from Fayetteville, North Carolina, and moss currently lives in Richmond, Virginia with her husband. Welcome Anne Moss.

 

Anne:          01:31 Well thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it.

 

Sharon:          01:34 Well, it’s great to have you here and I’m really excited for our discussion today. So today Anne Moss and I are going to talk about really raising our children in this digital age that we live in and how to determine what aspects of this digital age are appropriate for our kids and really how to make sure that we are raising our kids to have the appropriate connection and problem solving skills that we all want them to have, despite this new technology that they’re being exposed to. So I’m excited to hear what you have to say about this. And I know that this is a subject that really is important to you and I’d love for you to share a little bit if you don’t mind, about your story and how you started talking about this topic.

 

Anne:          02:24 Well, uh, in 2015, I lost my son to suicide as a result of depression and addiction. And in looking at the whole picture, you know, I notice early traits, but I also noticed that the culture itself wasn’t providing children with adequate coping skills because they don’t have as much face to face time. They’re getting 45% less face time than the generation before. So that playground time is when kids start to develop coping skills, negotiation skills. They don’t have a referee, they have to solve some of these problems themselves when they’re playing dodge ball and they think somebody cheated, they have to work that out and that is valuable in building resilience. Well kids are now getting fewer of those opportunities. So I think that means that we’ve got to fill in those opportunities to help them develop those skills.

 

Sharon:          03:35 Yeah, I couldn’t agree more. I mean I think that it is something that’s true. I think not only are they getting less face time at home, they’re also cutting out recess and there’s less free time at school in general for that reason. But even a lot of the face time that kids get with their friends ends up being time that’s spent using some digital modalities. And so I’d love to speak a little bit about that because you know, I, I don’t have sons. I have daughters and I know that it is a little bit different, but I hear from a lot of friends of mine that do have sons that often their play dates are around a certain video game and they might not even have play dates where they’re in the same house. They may be having time where they’re playing Fortnite together as a scheduled play date, but they’re not even in the same room. And so even the connection that we’re hoping to have our kids develop has been changed just by the nature of the culture.

 

Anne:          04:44 Yeah, you’re exactly right. Um, the first thing I would say is try to plan some things outside the house if you can, and see that those kids get together, cause they’re gonna argue at times they’re going to get along at others and it’s an opportunity for them to learn those skills. So what I did is that, so I have this son who really craved connection more than the average kid and he would go knock on doors and beg people to come out to play outside because he preferred that over video games cause he wanted that face to face connection. So he would come home looking all dejected. And then I thought, well how can I work with technology instead of thinking that we’re going to go back to the old days because that’s not going to happen. Right. So here’s what I did. I decided to get them, they needed a new computer. So I got them a Mac and I put it in our hallway and this was just when youtube was coming out and I said, you guys can start a channel and you can’t use your real names. So what happened was that they started to develop scripts and then they started to develop, okay, what is everybody wearing? They had to figure out a whole plan of how they were going to execute this and they loved it. Now where I got into a lot of trouble with the other parents, they weren’t happy with me because now their kids wanted to be in these same to productions and it was a new thing and they were afraid of it. And I’m like, so you think it’s better for them to be playing the games then you know, doing stuff outside so that, you know, the dress up box became the central most important play thing in our house instead of the video games.

 

Anne:          06:54 So ultimately it started to kind of work out and they, you know, brought friends together and, and that was my answer to okay, we’re going to have the technology, but how can we make the technology so that it’s bringing people together instead of pushing everybody apart in their separate houses because they need that face to face connection time or they’re not going to be developing those skills. And I think as parents we also need to be listening more and lecturing less. So I think we need to acknowledge that children have certain feelings and not try to fix it, but just empathize and ask them what do you think we should do about that? Put it in their court and see what solutions they come up with. And sometimes they’re going to be funny if they’re really young and sometimes they’re going to be some very creative or cool solutions. What we tend to do is not let them finish or we don’t understand what’s behind their fear. And I think if we need to explore that, like I don’t want to go to the doctor sit down. What is it that scares you about going to the doctor in a non-threatening way? I’m ready to listen. Sometimes it’s like something, well I got a shot there last time.

 

Anne:          08:32 Well how long did it hurt? It was, it hurt. Well how long does it hurt? Two seconds. Do you think you could put up with two seconds to avoid something that could affect, you know, you much longer? Do you think you could do that again? You know, explore and figure out why kids are the way they’re feeling. And you know, it’s so easy to hit the lecture mode. And I literally stopped all lecturing when my kids were teenagers. I said, I’m never gonna do it again. And whenever I went into lecture mode, I told them to tell me, mom, that’s unsolicited advice. Now they have to be old enough to understand what that means, but I empowered them to help me break that habit. And it took me more than a week to do. But as a result to this day, I don’t lecture. I mostly ask questions.

 

Anne:          09:37 And when you ask questions, you putting it in their court and they start to think about it. Even if they don’t answer immediately. Like if you’ve got a child who’s an introvert, he may take a day or a week to think about it and he may come back and present that solution or ask you about it again. So I think that’s one way we could start to empower our children to develop, you know, their own skills. And that is a really easy thing. Once you start doing it, it’s tough to get in that habit. But once you do, that just becomes the way you parent.

 

Sharon:          10:16 Yeah. I also think that, I mean in essence what you’re talking about is kind of like being their coach rather than, you know, telling them what to do and sort of, I think the value in that is that they are learning their own coping and problem solving skills, but they also are learning that you’re there and you’re not just ignoring them and they know, I think deep down in the bottom of their heart then that you care enough that when they do want you to really help them with something, you’ll always be available, you know? And I think that the way you ask your questions and the way you respond to their answers helps them to navigate things too and helps them to learn sort of what’s in your head and what you, you know, what you are really truly wanting for them. And it’s not to parrot you, it’s to really develop their own sense of values. Set of values.

 

Anne:          11:19 Yeah. Right now I think that also helps them to build self esteem. That they start to feel important. Like whatever they say matters because especially if you’re the youngest in the household, you’re always scrambling for people to listen to your idea because you know, you just feel like I’m the bottom of the totem pole.

 

Sharon:          11:44 I laugh because of my youngest daughter is so loud and making sure she’s heard. Yeah. But in a family with four kids, you know, she has to make sure she’s,

 

Anne:          11:58 She’s looking for that validation that this is an opportunity to do that and what’s interesting if that child has a lot of siblings, like in a large family like you’re talking about, the other siblings will start to participate in that as well. And that makes her feel really important because those are big sisters or big brothers they’re looking up to. Yeah. So they definitely want to make an impression there.

 

Sharon:          12:26 Yeah. I mean, what would you say are the skills that are kind of, I don’t want to say the most important cause I think they’re all important, but the ones that you think that we really have the most influence on helping our kids develop, especially in the way that you’re describing where you’re sort of saying the best way to help them develop is by taking a step back in a sence.

 

Anne:          12:55 Exactly. I think really empathy, it’s one of the key skills we want to develop in our children because we want them to understand things from another point of view so we can tell our own stories to facilitate that. But that’s where the listening comes in. If we start to listen with empathy now there are, you kind of pointed out a minute ago, Sharon, that it’s the way you ask. So if you ask in kind of an accusatory way, they’re gonna take it that way. But they can tell when you are asking with empathy, tell me why you’re afraid to go to the doctor or the psychiatrist. I would really love to understand. And then you sit down and they see it on your face that you’re not gonna just yanked them out the door, that you really do want to know and want to get to the heart of the issue and you’re not going to pass judgment.

 

Anne:          13:59 So they have to have that feeling that you’re not going to shame them, you know, with how they feel. And once they express how they feel, you can work with that and then you can ask more questions because sometimes when they talk about their fears, it drags it out into the spotlight and it loses its sizzle. It loses the pointy edges and it becomes less of a big deal when they say it out loud and they start to, it’s that old saying, your grandmother said, well, is the sky falling? You know, they build up this big fear, which is what happens in your own brain when we don’t connect with each other. So when we let it out, it starts to dissipate.

 

Anne:          14:52 And we’re sharing it with more people and there feels like there’s this shared responsibility for that anxiety instead of it being pinned up in your head. And I remember when my children were little, they found a brain tumor and Charles, my youngest, really was very, very worried and I kept telling him, it’s a benign tumor, could do a lot of things, but I’m unlikely to die from it. He said, well mom, you’re going to have brain surgery. And I said, yes I am. And then finally I realized, you know, he has never had a parent had surgery at all. What is he worried about? He was three or four years old at the time. So I sat down with them and that said, tell me what you’re worried about. He was worried that the wound would be open and that all of the family members would have to stop, the constant bleeding.

 

Anne:          15:54 And then how would we keep the brain inside my head? So he didn’t know that there was a thing called stitches or staples. He thought they cut me open, they would take the tumor out and then it would be left open. And it was everybody’s responsibilities to stop the gushing and the bleeding. And of course that never occurred to me, but, but you are able to make him feel much, oh it’s going to have staples and they’re going to have blood crusted on the outside because he liked a little bit of gory. He loved a little bit of gory and he, you know, instead he became intrigued instead of, I mean they were fearful in this process anyway, but I was able to address directly his fear of course, which you can’t address if you never ask what it is exactly, exactly. Because their fares are so different than ours and we think as adults, and I’ll be honest, we did, some of your most treasured memories are going to be when you ask these questions.

 

Sharon:          17:05 So it is so worth it. It’s just fun. I tell the moms I work with to keep a journal of things, otherwise you don’t remember it. The other thing we talk about a lot is just emotion coaching in general and how it really starts with age three or even younger and it’s a continuous process. And, you know, I asked these same types of questions of my four year old as I do of my 13 year old. You know, and of course we’re having very different discussions around it, but it’s important to, I think. if you can start having kind of conversations when they’re young, you avoid some of that. Not all of it, but some of that kind of like teenage angst over having these discussions.

 

Sharon:          18:04 And I say not all of it because of course sometimes, you know, my daughter doesn’t feel like being coached, you know, or whatever it is and, and I respect that. But I am who I am too and, and I know who I would like her to become. And so, you know, I think that just knowing that we’ve put in that work for the last 12 years makes a big difference. And I think it makes a big difference to me and my husband, his parents that we, we have more confidence in sort of what kind of child, adult really, she’ll end up becoming. But I think she also has a lot more confidence in knowing that we have her back and we, you know, we are parents where if she’s having fights with her friends or whatever it is, she comes and discusses it with us because she knows that we’re not going to be judgmental about it is what it really comes down to.

 

Sharon:          18:59 You know? And I think that’s what our kids are afraid of. Sometimes they don’t want, they’re not looking for judgment and I don’t think any of us are. Right. Right. You know, when you have a friend and you’re presenting a problem to a friend, you’re probably not presenting your problem to the friend thinking, do you think he’s going to judge you over it? Right. And you know, it’s the same thing. Not that, you know, I think that it’s important to let them know how you really feel about something, but there is a way to do that where they know it’s coming out of caring and concern rather than from a place of judgment.

 

Anne:          19:35 You’re exactly right. Those are some excellent points. And I think it’s also important to point out when you’re not in a good mood. Like we’re not always going to be in a good mood. We’re not always going to be perfect. We’ll be short tempered. Things are not happening well today. That’s not going well. And that’s an opportunity when we like snip at our kids. Oh wow, I’m really snipping you guys a lot today. And I had this happen this morning. And as a result of that, so teaching kids that that outward behavior that they often run across has a meaning behind it that has absolutely nothing to do with them because people tend to take those things personally. And you know, I switched when they were teenagers and started, you know, kind of late to be pointing that out that that’s not because of you. It’s because there’s something going on at home, you know, that you have nothing to do with and that you have no control over. Maybe there’s a way could show empathy for that child instead, you know, cause there’s a lot of things that goes on behind closed doors.

 

Anne:          21:00 The biggest thing is I think in children’s lives that don’t get addressed is grief. And that is grief over loss. Grandmother, a lost parent, a lost sibling, a lost uncle, cousin, neighbor, a can deeply affect children. And that unresolved loss is one of the key triggers to later problems in school and problems with relationships. And they call it unresolved grief. So when we lose somebody, for example, adults, we tend to kind of go into a room where we’re gonna grieve over here. But it’s also important for our children to see us grieving. If we lost someone we love, so, or we’ve lost somebody in the neighborhood and there is a lot of loss these days, a lot more than usual because of the opiod epidemic and the RA’s and the suicide rates. And I think that’s another helping coping strategy that we can help our children with is allowing them to talk about the person that died asking them, well, what did you think was so special about so? And that has come up again and again in studies. So I thought it was really important to point that out in this podcast.

 

Sharon:          22:23 Thank you. So I want to get back to some strategies for sort of like how to navigate this world that we do live in and, and I loved the idea you gave of sort of how to get your kids involved, where you’re not necessarily isolating them from the technology, but there you’re just using it differently. And if you have any other sort of tips for, you know, how do you, how do you not make them feel like you’re taking something away from them? Because I think that that only makes them want it more. It does, but you’re still keeping true to your own values and what you really truly want for them.

 

Anne:          23:10 Well there’s a game on the iPad where you can kind of spin the wheel. So you could have like a whole circle of kids and do the spin the wheel. And I think you can put a number of things on the spin the wheel, you know, whether it’s do something funny or stand on your head or whatever. But that’s a way to kind of integrate technology that, okay, you got to have the wheel on the iPad, right? And then everybody takes a turn. But they’re all together in the same woroomrld.

 

Sharon:          23:45 There’s some charades, games like that too. Where you hold the ipad up. And you know, I mean, listen, it’s basically like adding this little piece of technology to the games that we all know and it makes them feel like they’re using technology even though we know that the technology has very little like place in that game in a sense. You know? And that’s not really the point. I love that idea. And there are probably a lot of games like that that you could suggest. And then, you know, I think it’s important to also to know what you’re allowing them to do and what you’re not allowing them to do and to have a good reason behind it. And I don’t think it’s wrong to explain that to them, you know? And so, you know, we have been pretty firm on our social media practices with our kids because we just don’t necessarily see a lot of value in certain things.

 

Sharon:          24:43 And I’ve spoken about this before on the podcast where I feel like there is the fine line between sort of not allowing your child to do something but you don’t think they’re ready for versus leading to them being a social outcast based on culture. Right. And that was how our daughter, when she started sixth grade ended up with an iPhone because on one hand, I didn’t really think she needed it, but on the other hand, you know, her classmates had them since second grade and we felt like between second and fifth grade she really didn’t need it. But it also wasn’t causing that kind of feeling of being a social outcast, not having it. And at some point we crossed that line. Right? Where we said, well she doesn’t maybe really need it, but at this point if she doesn’t have it, we may be running into a different set of problems, you know?

 

Sharon:          25:36 And that’s where we’re at kind of right now. For example, with social media and Instagram. Right? Like I feel that my daughter is still at an age where she doesn’t really need it. But my guess is over the next year we’ll probably approach the time where I still don’t really think she needs it, but she’s gonna end up having it. Right. And then it becomes, you know, our job to make sure that she knows what the rules of use are and what the guidelines for what we think is acceptable and unacceptable are. And it’s really hard. It’s not easy once you give them something like this, you can’t really, it’s very hard to take it away. Right. And so my best advice to parents would be to make sure before you give the okay that you think it’s something that they are responsible enough to use and that there is any kind of value in them even having it. Because once they have something, it’s, you know, it, it becomes, not that you can’t, but it becomes very hard to then say you can’t have it anymore.

 

Anne:          26:44 I’m a big fan of Kelly Greer who talks a lot about apps and setting limits with technology. And you know, I’m a digital marketing expert so, and my son had a sleep problem, so we had a rule, no phones in the room at night and we have the same rule. And because they followed that, I followed it too. So everybody’s phones charged in our bathroom, including mine. Mine was not next to my bedside. How am I going to wake up without an alarm? Well, there are other alarms and there’s some funny ones that’ll laugh in the morning or dance on the floor. I’ve been there, all kinds of hilarious ones and my son was like, I want to listen to music. And back then we had iPods with no internet or Wifi connection and you can still get those if they want. I’m okay with them listening to music at night or a meditation, but control what goes in that room at night. And you set those limits at the very beginning because if you don’t, like you said a minute ago, Sharon, if you start to imply, you know, impose those limits later, you’re going to get a lot of that.

 

Sharon:          28:03 Yeah. And thinking it’s important to discuss this with your co-parent. And I think even with your child, you know, before you agree to give them something you can ask them for their input on setting the rules and it makes it much easier for them to be followed later too. You know? And that doesn’t mean you’re going to take whatever they say and that’s what becomes, but you will find that they tend to be even sometimes a little more strict than you would with that power. You know? And I actually charge my phone in the bathroom too and it, it actually, I find it, I started doing it actually not because of them, but because I found that when I wanted to get up really early, it helped me get out of bed to turn it off. But our kids each have their own alarm clock that is not part of their phone or iPod or anything like that.

 

Sharon:          28:58 It’s just a standalone old school alarm clock. And it works great and they are responsible for setting it each night and getting up on their own in the morning. And it works great. And I think that, you know, it’s also equally important to, to show them how much you value face to face connection and how much you value that. Not just for them and with, you know, for them and their friends and their siblings, but even for yourself in your own life. And you know, my husband and I have many, you know, adult outings with our friends and you know, we talk about them with our kids and we, they know we’re going. And you know, I think it’s important for them to see that we’re not meeting our friends always to go see a movie. We’re actually having dinner and we’re having conversation. And this is the purpose of our getting together is to build that connection with our friends and that’s what we want for them.

 

Sharon:          30:00 And, and to help them set those things up with their friends. And that doesn’t mean you have to have a play date every day of the week, you know, but that there is some time allotted for non-screen time.

 

Anne:          30:10 Right. And, uh, I will say that we would have kind of a family night. We tried to do it at least three times a month. And sometimes that’s really hard. But I noticed particularly with Charles, he loved those moments. I mean, he just relish them. And I think the role modeling is a big one. I’ve been a member of a book club for like 20 years and what’s happening now is I’m at the age where all these friends of, uh, all my friends from the book club, all their children are getting married now and they’re inviting the book club members because they would come downstairs and we would all be dancing, you know, we’re just like in, they’re all just having the best time.

 

Anne:          31:06 And clearly we’re a group that loves each other and no piece of technology other than the thing that’s admitting the music. Those kids will tell those stories now and they’ll show us films that they took on their iPhone of us dancing and they’re like, we’re going to use this as blackmail. And I had no idea until now how meaningful those relationships were to our children and how much value they got out of them. Even though they didn’t actually come to our book club. You know, usually when they were young dad would take them out and then they will of course they have to come home and be put to bed. Right. And they would see us all engaged with each other and you know, you want to show off your kids and you want your kids to see all your friends. They will remember those moments of connection did I had with my friends.

 

Sharon:          32:15 Oh and I bet they learned a lot more. The saw you reading, you know, your, the how much you love books, how much you love that connection. I would be really curious to hear in a few years how many of them started book clubs with their own friends. You know, and it’s interesting to hear how things that we do really do provide a huge impact on them and their adult lives.

 

Anne:          32:40 They’ll often talk about, you know, usually once a year or twice a year I have family over for big, you know, everybody come, it’s pot luck and I’m usually hosting that. And is it work? Well my house isn’t perfect, you know, if it’s not perfect they could give a flip. They’re just happy that somebody said I will host it, come over to my house. My children remember those nights and, and my niece does too. And my niece, her father lives in North Carolina, her mother is in upstate New York. So she really craves those connections. And those family moments are a big deal and they really remember them. And again that goes back to that role modeling. And those are the experiences that you think about if my age and older and those are what I reflect back on. I don’t think about that checklist that I had to get done on Tuesday in 2008. I don’t even remember what it is, but I remember those family moments like, and I love your idea about journaling.

 

Sharon:          33:59 Yeah, I think, you know, I work with a lot of moms and they’ll tell me like, oh, so-and-so said the funniest thing or you know, I wish I remembered everything and I just tell them write it all down because you’re not going to remember it. And especially if you have a memory like mine, I, you know, there’s no way I’m remembering it, so.

 

Anne:          34:19 And that’s the good part about technology is you can pull out that memo pad and write it down.

 

Sharon:          34:26 It’s true. Although I will say I still journal on a regular old notebook.

 

Anne:          34:31 Yeah, that’s fine too. It depends on what you have handy. A lot of people are going back to, like I just wrote a book and I did a survey of what I thought electronic books would be the clear winner. It was paperback.

 

Sharon:          34:50 I prefer to read on paperback.

 

Anne:          34:52 So my publisher was like, should we come out with hardback or paperback now? Like I think we should come out with an ebook. Can you guys know that’s changing? So when I, you know, I’ll store vague, my readers, you know I have hundreds of thousands of followers, so and they wanted a paperback and that was like 85% said paperback was the clear winner. And then I thought, well maybe it’s because my audience is skewing a little bit more of the 45 to 65 but even my young readers who wanted to read the book because they’re following Charles’s journey and they want to hear more about him, they wanted paper back too. In fact, they wanted paperback at a higher rate then my generation because my generation, it’s like, well I got to get on the airplane. I want to carry five books, therefore I want my tablet. But that teenage generation wanted the physical book.

 

Sharon:          35:52 Yeah, I prefer to read a physical book, although you know, sometimes you, the ebooks are way less expensive, but the truth is that I enjoy reading more in on a regular book. A lot of my friends listen to audiobooks and I was just talking to a friend this morning about that. How, for me, the problem is the way that an audio book is read greatly influences your experience. And so, you know, I actually, there’s a book I want to read now written by someone that I happen to have met and I, you know, I know her. So I can’t imagine if there were an audio book that was read by anyone other than her, I wouldn’t enjoy it. Right. And whereas reading the book myself, I can imagine her reading it to me. Right. And it’s different. I’d love to hear for a couple of minutes about the book and, and when it’s coming out. 

 

Anne:          36:50 Oh, it’s coming out this fall. It’s coming out. In fact, it has been sent to the printer and it should be out October 1st.

 

Sharon:          37:00 Wonderful. Congratulations.

 

Anne:          37:05 Thank you. It’s called Diary of a Broken Mind and I talk about the before, during and after. So you know, when he was a toddler and those early signs and even some funny, fun stories about my son. And then when we were in the, oh my gosh, what do we do next part, you know, uh, finding support, how we get help. And then my afterwards, after he died, how did, how did I survive, cause you think you’re never going to survive that. So I talk about all those phases and I also included my son’s, he kept a journal and I call it his rap diaries. And there were rap lyrics that he wrote that gives me, that gave me the why behind his suicide and addiction and his love of family. I had maybe not a full and clear picture of my son and who he really was until I read, this rap journal. I mean, so I included, um, I think at least 12 of those songs in the book. So it’s every other chapter. I mean there’s nothing like it. I mean it’s definitely a very different book.

 

Anne:          38:18 And then I make sure that I end on a message of hope and healing because I need that. And I know my audience does too.

 

Sharon:          38:27 For sure. Well thank you for sharing some of your story and I’m sure that there, you know, we will definitely link to that book and promote it when it comes out. And I look forward to reading it. And I think there’s a lot that can be learned and experienced from reading such a powerful story.

 

Anne:          38:48 And that’s what I want, I don’t want other people standing in my shoes and I also have a, um, a free download for your audience and it’s nine ways to build resilience in your children. So just a little parenting strategies. It’s not a whole book, but it’s five or six pages, which is something a young mother can read. You know, sometimes sitting down with a book you want to read, you want to get lost in a novel. And this is just kind of a short overview that kind of starts to marinate in your brain and you start to see opportunities, just little opportunities to build that resilience.

 

Sharon:          39:30 Okay, wonderful. So we’ll link to that as well in the show notes and thank you so much Anne Moss for being here and sharing your wisdom with our audience and I look forward to hearing more from you and following along and reading your book.

 

Anne:          39:48 Thanks so much.

 

Sharon:          39:50 Thank you. Thanks for listening to the Raiseology podcast. Head over to www.Raiseology.com where you’ll find plenty of, you’ve got this resources for parents and any links or tools mentioned in today’s show. Be sure to hit subscribe on your podcatcher so that you can listen to the next episode the minute it’s out, until next time, have an empowered week.

Meet Your Mentor

Sharon is a general pediatrician, loving wife and mother to 4 daughters.

 After a decade of practicing general pediatrics and working with families, she realized there often wasn’t enough time while tending to children’s medical needs to help parents in the way that would be most helpful in shaping their children’s futures.

 The Raiseology Program was developed to teach parents how to raise their children with the love and authority necessary to promote resilience and responsibility.

Sharon’s experience with hundreds of families as well as her own help her meet you where you are on your parenting journey to help you make it what you want it to be.

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